When it comes to chasing love, sometimes common sense gets thrown out of the window and people who are normally rational become just the opposite.  Is it desperation, the belief that people are all good, or the need to feel wanted that make humans believe some of the craziest lies ever told to cover the other person’s cheating.  Know your worth and stick to your standards so that you won’t end up waiting on a relationship that may never happen.

I can’t leave because of financial reasons

We have all known people who have said something like this or who have had something like this said to them only to find out that most of the times this is the base to the house of lies that is being built.  Even though you don’t truly believe this you go with it anyway because they make you feel wanted, seeming to not care about the day you find out the truth and your heart gets crushed yet again. How wanted are you going to feel when the holidays come around and you’re spending it without your part-time lover?

Why any person would put up with this type of bull for even a second is beyond me.  If they are telling the truth, then there is a paper trail of some kind somewhere and a simple solution would be to ask to see the paperwork (along with the fake explanation they already gave you) that proves that they are “stuck” staying in the same house with their supposed ex. If they can’t show you anything, then you have your answer and if they do show you something then it’s up to you to decide how long you want to remain waiting on a relationship that may never happen.

I’m sleeping on the couch

Oh yeah, here is one of the most believed non-believable cheating excuses ever told.  Don’t get me wrong, I know a few people who have actually been in a situation where their soon to be ex wouldn’t leave and was actually the one sleeping on the couch until the court date.  Just like the “I can’t leave because of financial reasons” excuse, there should be a paper trail or a notice of a court date that would validate their statement.  The easiest thing to do is to walk away and tell the other person to call you once their raggedy situation is over and either they or their “soon to be ex” moves out, but for some reason more people would stay and put up with this than leave.

There are too many people in the world for you to sit around waiting on a person to get out of their messy situation.  While you’re waiting on a relationship that may never happen you could be missing out on a great relationship with someone who is fully available now.  Stop letting the “couch sleeper” manipulate your time while you’re left missing out on all the good that you could be living without them.

I can’t leave because of my kid(s)

I never understood why some people would actually waste their time with a person once those words dripped from their lips.  Let’s say that their kid is 5, are you going to continue waiting on a relationship that may never happen for another 13 years.  Come on people let’s use some common sense here.  Whoever gets caught up with a person who says this, is only asking to get hurt.  Instead of taking all of the hurt, punishment and heart ache over the life of this part time relationship just tell the other person to punch you in the face right then and there so you get all your hurt up front and have a reason to walk away from the start.

With that being said, I’m not even going to waste my time writing something on the “I’m leaving my spouse but, it’s complicated and going to take some time” lie.  The only thing I will say is if you fall for this then you deserve to get your heart stomped on!  [This is a great place for a shameless plug of similar article written on this subject called – Stop Chasing Hearts That Don’t Want To Be Caught]

I never understood why people would deal with or can’t see a lie like this at face value. Why give the benefit of the doubt to someone because they have a great job, money, or even you can see yourself with them.  But, I’m not here to judge you or make you feel bad if you are currently going through something like this.  What I am here to do is have you take a good look at what you’re going through and to have you think about the most logical outcome, so if you’re currently waiting on a relationship that may never happen I want to leave you with this question.  How long are you willing to put up with a part-time relationship and continue to look like a full-time fool?

Author: B.A.M

17 COMMENTS

  1. O.M.G YOU JUST SAID A MOUTH FULL WITH THIS ONE. AS I AM DEALING WITH THE FIRST PORTION OF YOUR POST I NEVER EVER COULD SEE THE WRONG I WAS AND STILL AM DEALING WITH UNTIL I SAW IT IN WRIGHTING. TIME TO MAKE A CHANGE EITHER STOP BEING A “GOOD GIRL” AND WILD OUT.. OR STAY A “GOOD GIRL” AND FIND A BETTER MAN…

    • Toosweet, thanks for visiting us and we are sorry to hear that you are going through something like this. If i were you i would stay a good girl and find a better man.

      I just want to say that people like you are the reason we started this site. If something that we wrote helps just one person then we did our job. Please click the share buttons and send this or any other article to anyone you know who could benefit our site.

  2. I’ve never done this in my own life but I suspect it’s because being lonely can be painful and if they’ve really connected with someone it’s hard to believe they’re being lied to.

    • Pam, i have never done this either but I know a few who have and the hurt they feel when they finally see the truth is horrible

  3. Hi Jay. Waiting on a questionable relationship doesn’t make much sense to me. We probably all delude ourselves in some ways but this area is too important and definitely not the place to do it

    • Paul, you are correct bye stone how there are a lot of woman that are wasting time waiting for their so called man to leave his wife. Or men waiting for woman who string them along until someone better comes along

  4. when it comes to relationships an abundance of people leave their brain on the shelf and let’s their heart or desperation take over. Some even make the same mistake over and over again. And it’s pointless to try to change their mind. They have to learn their own lessens. That some of them never learn is unfortunate, to put it mildly.

    • Catarina, you are correct when you say some people are so desperate. There are some people who are clueless and once they find out they will leave but the people who repeat the desperate act are the ones who I feel sorry for.

  5. I have witness these very things with a few friends. I find this all very sad. I have a great deal of trouble understanding why we/they do this. The one example that stands out was my best friend who was in fear of leaving her marriage. On the extreme, that one ended very badly with her death. 🙁

    • Susan, wow I’m sorry to hea that. Yes it is sad and I don’t know why people stay with someone who isn’t treating them right… thanks for sharing

  6. Man o man have I head some stuff…the open marriage one is the best…she does what she wants and I do what I want…yeah right. Never saw the upside a moment of joy when faced with hours/days/months of unhappiness. And then there’s the ripple effect…all the other people who will get hurt

  7. Throughout each point I hear you saying “think long term”. Sometimes temporary decisions may be more convenient but it’s only issue avoidance, not really dealing with the problem.

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