Relationships

Talking Bad About Your Spouse to Others

Talking Bad About Your Spouse to Others
Jubair and Tyanna

I think it is crazy when I hear men talk about their spouse and the only words that are coming out of their mouths are negative ones.   When I hear this I always wonder how much of what they are saying is true and how much is to impress the idiots who are feeding into the story.  This is a huge problem with their relationships because instead of “Talking Bad About Your Spouse to Others” they should be talking to their spouse about what is bothering them.

The Akward Dinner

My wife and I were at a dinner party with friends and family and something grabbed our attention and we both started “ear hustling” (being nosey) and could not believe what we were hearing.  We actually looked at each other with that “I can not believe this is happening” look that spouses who are in tune with each other give each other.  Here are some snippets of the conversations from the night.

Idiot #1:  Man I can not stand my wife she really gets on my nerves.

Idiot #2:  Yeah my wife gets on my nerves too.  Any time I go meet up with the fellas she keeps calling to ask me when I am coming home.  Eventually, I get tired of all the calls and just go home.

Idiot #1:  Your wife and mine must be related because my wife does the same thing except she takes it up a notch and will show up where I am, like I am cheating on her or something.  When the truth is, I just do not want to sit in he house and be bored with her.

Not to be outdone, Idiot #2 decides to add some spice to his story.

Idiot #2  Yeah my wife acts like a warden and has to know where I am at at all times.  I think she has a tracker on my phone because I can lie and tell her I am going one place but somehow she will show up at the spot where I really am.

Idiot #1  It is to the point where I do not want to go home.  I  go to a bar or to a friends house just so that I can have some peace before I go home and get barked at about me coming home late and all the things in the house that I am not doing.

Idiot #2  I do the same thing cause I know that the nagging will start before I step out of the car.  This crazy lady will run out the house and meet me in the driveway arguing with me and I have not even said a word.

This back and forth idiotic one upping actually went on for a few hours with the disrespect getting even worst as more empty liquor bottles went into the recycle bin.  During a few times that evening my wife looked at me and said “If you ever talk about me like that I will chop you in the throat!”  I told her you do not have to worry about that because I actually like you.  We discussed the nights events all the way home and could not believe that people would actually spend hours “Talking Bad About Your Spouse to Others.”

Where Did Things Go Wrong

The wife and I talked about this and wondered what would happen if Idiot #1 would actually take his wife out to do something that she wanted to do instead of just brushing her off as being a boring home body.  What if Idiot #2 acted like his marriage was a place that he actually wanted to be a part of instead of treating the marriage like a prison sentence.  We wondered if they actually talked to their spouses about what they would like to do instead of just throwing their relationship in the junk drawer like you would do with a little “Do Hickey” that you found on the floor.

We also wondered how it could get so bad that you do not even want to go home.  Is their spouse that bad or is the spouse acting like that because of the actions of idiot #1 and 2.  Another thing that we wondered was if the spouses even talked TO each other or if they just talked AT one another.

We really like each other

One conclusion that we came to was that we not only love each other but we really like each other.  We refuse to get to a point in our relationship where one of us does not want to come home.  We are constantly communicating with each other and will call or text the other if we are not coming home or stopping by a store after work.  We work on our marriage and do things together that we both enjoy.  We also will do the things that only one of us enjoys but the other one does not.  Basically, if it matters to you, it matters to me.

The most important thing that we both agreed on after leaving that dinner and listening to Idiot #1 and #2 is that, we will always make an effort to talk to each other about the good things and things that may pose a challenge in our relationship so that we do not get caught “Talking Bad About Your Spouse to Others” while we are out with friends

Author: B.A.M

View Comments (6)

6 Comments

  1. Niekka Mc Donald

    11/27/2014 at 9:10 AM

    I have always wondered why people talk bad about their spouses. This is the person you share your life with and at some point something happened to get you both to this point. I think some people like to complain and compare problems. It’s good to hear about the work you and your wife put into your relationship and that you like each other, that’s very important.

    • BallNChainz

      12/01/2014 at 11:49 AM

      Thanks Niekka, I have heard a few guys say that they love their wives but don’t really like them. I don’t understand that but yes liking your spouse is very important.

  2. Sue Hines

    12/01/2014 at 11:34 AM

    I can think of so many people who should read this post! Gripe sessions are unsupportive wherever they occur. Glad to hear you and your wife have the kind of relationship where stuff doesn’t get stuck and fester.

    • BallNChainz

      12/01/2014 at 11:47 AM

      Thanks Sue. I know a whole lot of people that won’t read this but need to.

  3. Mark

    12/04/2014 at 1:00 PM

    I agree totally. My wife is always right. What I mean is that I always support her. She is brilliant at exaggerating stories as am I to give them more flavour but we both just go with it. I hear so many couples butting into each others stories correcting them it takes forever to tell them and the point is lost.
    You know well that in my blogs I often refer to my wife but never badly. If I write about her she knows first and i always write about what she will do to me. After my last post I deserve it.
    Once again you make excellent points about talking about each other. If you know each other you can have playful banter but you also have to know when to stop.

    • BallNChainz

      12/18/2014 at 11:08 AM

      Thanks Mark. Yeah you never speak badly of your wife, other women maybe but never your wife. Lol thanks again for another great comment.

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Relationships
Jubair and Tyanna
@http://twitter.com/ballnchainz

Ballnchainz is a relationship blog that covers the topics of Marriage, Family, Couples Finances, and Divorce from both the woman and mans point of view in a slightly comedic way.

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