There are a lot of men who have a problem if their wife/significant other are more successful and are making more money than they are.  I don’t know if the issue is that they were coddled for way too long, which caused a delay in their maturity, or if they just have very low self-esteem.  Regardless of how they got to this mindset, I want to say to these men, so what she makes more money than you… Get over it!!!

To see the counterpart to this article click this link called Fix Your Man a Sandwich to open the article on this site.

So what I make more money than you

I know many women who are successful in their careers but struggle in their personal life due to no mistake of their own.  The men that they meet seem to get so hung up on the fact that their lady makes more money than they do, that the relationship gets stuck in a continuous loop of doubt in the man’s head.  I could see it if these ladies were throwing this fact around in their man’s face, but, in these relationships that is not the case.  These guys are the ones who still live in the past where women are supposed to cook the bacon that the man brings home.

Fellas, you have a lady who loves you and is trying to build a life with you, but you are willing to flush a great relationship down the toilet because your ego is bigger than your paycheck.  You have to be some kind of special stupid that you’re stuck on the fact that your lady is more successful than you, even though she keeps telling you that she is with you and all the great things you have to offer, not your job.  These ladies are all about “team us” and tell their man that there is no me or you there is only us.  She doesn’t care that she makes more money than you and gets tired of having to always reassure your pea sized brain that you contribute to the house hold in other ways.  The problem is that this immature man is so self-conscious of this that he will continue to emasculate himself time and time again because of his self-doubt.  Grow up, grow a pair, and recognize the great woman that you have, before you end up stuck with a selfish woman on your pay scale (LOL that actually made me laugh while typing that one).

Immature man and selfless woman

I’m not sure how this continues to happen, but I see a lot of women who have their stuff together that end up with these men who still think they should be taken care of.  Now sometimes this is strategic in the fact that the man is looking for a sugar mama, though he may love her he loves the possibility of the security that she has to offer more.  I’m not talking about these so called con men.  I’m talking about the immature man who wants to move in with his lady just so he doesn’t have the full responsibility of taking care of himself.  This bum is mooching off of his lady but still egotistical enough to throw the fact that she makes more money than him, back in her face.

It is these types of men who make it hard for the good men out there.  This type of guy will treat his lady so bad just to make himself feel better about his situation. While he is busy trying to prove that he is “The MAN”, his lady becomes “relationship scared” which may eventually lead to her becoming one of those selfish women out there, but for now she is with you, so I digress.   A Man (and I use that word very loosely) like you are the true definition of a “scrub” (thanks TLC) and will do just enough to keep his meal ticket safe, oblivious to the fact that he is acting like a scared little boy with a napoleon complex.  This joker needs to grow up and learn to appreciate the woman he has and try to become a person who can function in a world outside the immature little Lego land that he has created in his head.

Get off the couch and do something productive

Lastly, we have the under achievers that come up with every excuse in the book as to why they can’t get a better job or why they can’t help out more at home, but will still find time to browbeat their lady to make themselves feel more important.  Their lady tries to encourage them to do better, and tries to support them but, these guys have the nerve to try and make her feel guilty by saying things like “I’m sorry I can’t help pay more bills because I don’t have a fancy job like you” or “I couldn’t afford to go to school”.  No, the truth is that you’re lazy and you chose not to better yourself and hopefully it’s only a matter of time before she leaves you.

I never understood how men could sit on the couch for hours on end playing video games and then complain that they can’t get ahead in the real world.  Put down the game controller and pick up a book in the field that you would like to work in.  Instead of spending hours on Facebook or looking at fight videos on the internet, why don’t you take a “How to make money on the internet training course”?  Start taking steps to do something to better yourself!

If you have a woman who makes more money than you, accepts you for who you are and everything that you bring to the table, get off your pity train and stop complaining about her accomplishments because it makes you feel less than a man (I don’t know why but it does).  If you are so distraught with the fact that she makes more money than you (even though it doesn’t matter to her) then stop complaining and do something about it.  There are too many resources out there and you have absolutely no excuse for not improving yourself to help increase your income.

Ladies, if you are with a man like any of the ones mentioned in this article who are not willing to change, I want to leave you with this don’t change who you are, just change who you are with.

Author: B.A.M

24 COMMENTS

  1. Well said! Hope you have impact. I’ve seen this up close and personal… particularly women who struggle to make their men more comfortable because the salaries are higher. Saw a gal lose her self-esteem, in an effort to help him find his! So that last sentence? Ladies pay attention!!! …don’t change who you are, just change who you are with. Prophetic!

  2. as someone who is always trying to better myself I can’t understand anyone who would rather complain about their situation rather than tai steps to improve it. thanks for the post,

  3. While I know the whiny/lazy guys are out there, and heaven knows I’ve had that chat with girlfriends on a number of occasions, but maybe we could give kudos to those guys who simply don’t care. They work on achieving their own success and don’t let how much their lady is making influence their self-confidence or treatment of her. They are the ones who deserve some air time. As to those women who stay with the whiner, well I’d say they have designed their own reward. 🙂

    • Debra, you are correct the men and women that do right deserve the praise but that article is coming in the near future. Thanks for the great comment

  4. Unfortunately I have been through this situation. No matter what I did it was never going to be okay because he felt less than. His insecurity lead to a lot of dysfunction in our relationship. Thank goodness I have moved on from that type of person. Good Post!

    • Thanks Niekka, i have friends who were in situations like yours which is what prompted me to write this post. Didn’t it feel so good when you got out and even better when you moved ib to the “next”. If you have time check out another article on here called “forgiving your ex so you can move ov with your next”

  5. I was briefly married to the “I need you to work and support me so I can get stoned and write the great American novel” guy. He decided he didn’t want to be married any more when I was accepted to law school—after he forgot to give me my acceptance letter. After law school, I married my real husband — considerate and a great father who was happy the few years I earned more than he did and who literally has been the wind beneath my wings — how cliche is that?—but it’s true.

  6. I agree and very well said indeed. I’m pretty lucky, my husband didn’t really care when I was the larger earner. The fact is it switched back and forth many times over the course of our married life. He never felt the money I made had any bearing on his masculinity or my femininity. It was all part of the whole of the family finances. 🙂

    • If it were me i would like at it like the money is going into the household so what difference does it make. Thanks for the comment

  7. Yea Jay…so what!!!!! Just spend the money she makes for you to enjoy and drop the ego. Or else do a constructive battle of finances and make the pool bigger. Growing muscles is better than growing a useless ego for your hardworking woman.

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