Relationships

Don’t Let Anger Overrule Common Sense

Don’t Let Anger Overrule Common Sense
Jubair and Tyanna

Whether couples are together or have split up there are times when someone will let their anger or spite get the best of them.  When a rational resolution to an issue comes up, there needs to be a decision made as to whether you will go with the “anger answer” or the better choice of the common sense answer.

Anger vs. Common Sense

We have all been upset at something that our significant other has done and that usually ends up with us having to make a choice between anger and common sense.  Anger is a tricky little thing that will creep its way into your rational decision.  When you let anger be responsible for a question/problem the results will usually end up worse than when you started.  Anger has a way of trying to get others to be just like him.  They say that “Misery Loves Company”, well Anger is like a black hole and will do everything in its power to disrupt and suck in anything and everyone around it.

While Common Sense, on the other hand, will try to help you find a peaceful and less confrontational resolution.  Using common sense to resolve issues over anger doesn’t make you a punk or mean that people will walk over you.  Hopefully, it will make people respect you more because you kept a cool head in a bad situation and still were able to resolve the issue.

Black Friday Evilness

1)  You’re in the store on black Friday and someone tries to snatch the last “next biggest thing” out of your hand.  Do you go with:

A)   Common sense and tell MR or MS rudeness that they have more in the back or in another aisle

B)   Chop them in the throat like Melissa McCarthy in Identity Thief LOL … In times like this, “Don’t Let Anger Overrule Common Sense” or you will be on the 5 o’clock news like the other idiots after Black Friday sales.

My answer :

Use common sense, lay in bed with your laptop and log into the stores that have the black Friday sale and buy everything online.  This is what I do every year without having to wait outside in the cold or in long lines.  To quote Charlie Sheen “Winning!”

Dealing with the Evil Ex

2)  Your ex sends you angry text messages or emails about how wrong you are for “insert ex’s hateful stupid statement here” Do you:

A)   Respond back with your own evil spew that while typing your”re thinking “yeah this will fix em”

B)   Say “Thank you, hope you’re having a great day”

My answer:

Using common sense in this situation will let your ex know that they no longer have the power over you to get you upset and will also show that you have moved on.

Even though I enjoy a good debate and I am a fan of letting your ex know they are wrong for X, Y, and Z and then telling them to have a great day/night.  Sometimes with certain people, you have to respond to show them that they are incorrect but also to prove your point.  This can either be done with anger or by using common sense and out witting them in a respectful manner.  When you’re in a sticky situation with your ex try not to make things worse and “Don’t Let Anger Overrule Common Sense.”

Revenge on Your Spouse

3)  Your spouse has been slacking in (fill in the area that first comes to mind here) and you are getting fed up with what you are beginning to think is being done on purpose just to piss you off.  Do you:

A)   Listen to the little red man with the horns on your left shoulder and go ‘tit for tat’ since now it’s all about the payback and beating them.

B)   Listen to the little man on your right shoulder with the glowing halo floating over his head and use common sense while trying to reason with them, letting them know that what they have been doing is making you upset for (state reasons here).

Answer 3:

Though the easiest way to try and get your point across is to yell, pout, plot revenge, or (once again) chop them in the throat, using common sense in situations will most likely stop the need for lawyers to get involved.  Having a heart to heart without accusing your spouse of wrong doing will often times resolve the situation without making them feel like they lost a fight or gave in so “Don’t Let Anger Overrule Common Sense”

The Bottom Line

Whenever we let anger take charge of our thoughts, the outcome is rarely good or what we want it to be.  As we have said in other articles on this site communication is the key to all relationships whether it’s with your ex, the ignorant people in the store, or you spouse.  What is just as important as using common sense when you are communicating is choosing to convey your point in a productive manner rather than just displaying anger and not getting any good results.

If you choose to communicate with anger then you should expect the other person to immediately start defending themselves against everything that comes out of your mouth.  While, if you chose to lead your conversation with common sense and with a calm tone the other person will not feel like you’re attacking them by talking “at” them instead of talking to them.

We have all heard the saying “It’s not what you say but how you say it”, but that is only part of the bigger picture.  It’s not just “how you say it” but also how you start it.  You can lead off a conversation with a nice tone and still put the other person in defense mode by saying stuff like “What were you thinking when you did that?” A better choice would be to use common sense and place the blame on yourself by starting off with something like, “Maybe I’m not understanding … blah blah blah.

Using common sense to approach whatever situation it is will usually have a better outcome than letting anger lead your way.  Even though we all would like to chop someone in the throat from time to time, the best approach is to use common sense from the start, middle, and ending of a situation to help all parties involved to keep a clear mind, cooler head and to come up with the best resolution.

Feel free to leave us a comment on this article or if you can you think of a specific time when you should have used common sense instead of anger?

Author: B.A.M

View Comments (4)

4 Comments

  1. Avatar

    crystalzakrison

    05/10/2014 at 3:38 AM

    I always say pause when agitated. if I am upset with someone I usually wait 24 hours to talk to them. i let the steam roll off and usually I am less angry and can think clearly. Also, I will not attempt to say something I regret. Great advice as always! =)

    • Avatar

      ballnchainz

      05/19/2014 at 6:58 AM

      Yes for some people this works and for others like my wife they can’t sleep unless they train about it when it happens. I wrote an article that touches on the different ways some people react to arguments/anger and why it’s OK to go to bed mad. Thanks for the great comment.

  2. Avatar

    Nancy Brisson

    07/22/2014 at 8:23 AM

    I like the use of humor in this. Sorry I can’t use the “like” button right now. My gravitar has disappeared and I seem unable to get a new one – just one of the joys of the internet.

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Relationships
Jubair and Tyanna
@http://twitter.com/ballnchainz

Ballnchainz is a relationship blog that covers the topics of Marriage, Family, Couples Finances, and Divorce from both the woman and mans point of view in a slightly comedic way.

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